Sometimes, sex can seem like the last thing on your mind after a long day of work, bills, cleaning, kids, pets, etc. Luckily, there are some ways to get yourself in the mood for intimacy.
For example, consuming foods that boost libido, such as bananas and peanut butter or celery can help. Plus, a warm bath is an excellent mood booster.
1. Eat your way sexy
It’s not uncommon to feel turned off and uninterested in your partner, especially after a long day. But you can turn your sexy engine back on. It may just take some quick tips, like eating certain foods that can help boost your libido.
Try consuming foods such as bananas, peanut butter and celery, which can provide your body with a natural boost of vitamin B and the endocrine hormone androsterone. These hormones are known to stimulate sexual desire and increase vaginal and full-body orgasms during sex and masturbation.
Also, make sure you are getting enough protein, as this is crucial for libido. It helps create muscle mass, which can give you more sexy energy.
Lastly, be sure to do some light exercise, which can reduce stress and boost your mood. For example, a simple walk or yoga session can help get your blood pumping. You can also try a sexy bedroom game that will encourage intimacy and communication between you and your partner. For example, you could play a sexy “touching” game in the bedroom where you touch each other all over the body and talk about what turns you on.
2. Listen to music
Music and sex go together like peanut butter and jelly, and there’s some science to back it up. A study from 2017 found that listening to your favorite song triggers the release of happy hormones and oxytocin, which can lead to an increase in sexual pleasure. If you’re looking for a playlist to help you get into the mood, try one that’s heavy on the sensual songs. This one from the Weeknd includes everything a good sexy playlist needs: Moaning lyrics about sexual longing and temptation, a smooth rhythm and bass that you can groove to, and a touch of aphrodisiac spice.
Or try this slow jam by SG Lewis. It’s got a soulful beat and husky vocals that are sure to seduce you and your partner into a mood to match the beat. Or if you want to keep it more intimate, invite your partner into the playlist-making process. They’ll be able to tell you what kind of music they like and what makes them feel good, which will make their selections more effective at getting you in the mood for sex.
3. Take a bath
You don’t need a huge tub for two to please each other in the water—even if you have a small bathroom, this is still an effective mood-booster. Grab a couple of massage oils and let your hands, arms, and legs glide against each other. This tingly feeling will get you both ready for the bedroom.
A big reason it may be harder to feel horny on demand is because of certain medications and conditions you’re taking. Some SSRIs, allergy medicines, antidepressants, and birth control can all dampen your libido. Other medical conditions and treatments such as cancer and chemotherapy can also lower sexual desire.
For example, many women find that their period halts their libido. In addition, being tired or stressed is a big no-no in the bedroom. Getting ahead of the game by doing little things throughout the day to help you feel more turned on (sexy texts, flirting, visualizing, etc) will make your experience that much better.
Exercise is a great way to get a little sweaty and feel more energized. It’s also a proven mood booster, and some workouts, like Zumba, can be a lot of fun. Exercise can help even out your hormones, which can have a big impact on your libido.
HIIT training—in which you alternate high-intensity exercises with short periods of rest—can be an especially effective libido catapulter. In addition to helping you burn calories, it’s a great way to boost blood flow and lower stress levels, which can make you sexier.
Foreplay is a major part of getting into the mood for sex, and you can do this by simply telling your significant other what you want to do. You can also try sending them a few hot and steamy text messages or even reading erotic material.
Some medicines can have a big impact on your sex drive, including SSRI antidepressants, certain kinds of birth control pills, and chemotherapy drugs. If you’re concerned your low libido might be due to medication, talk to your doctor about it.
There are some things you can control to help get you sexy, like eating the right foods, using your favorite lubricant, and listening to sexy music. But there are other things that you may not have control over, and they can put the brakes on your libido.
Stress can be a big turnoff for some people, and one of the best ways to deal with it is to relax. That doesn’t mean you have to go for a full-on wellness routine, but if you try taking a few deep breaths or focusing on your senses, it can make a big difference.
It’s also important to be clear about what your sexual accelerators and brakes are, so that you and your partner can work together to get sexy. It’s totally okay to say no when you’re not in the mood for sex, and it might actually be more romantic to take it slow than rush to the bedroom. Remember, it takes time for your body & brain to shift from your day to being intimate.